I remember reading somewhere recently, I think it was over at the Another Mother Runner website, a comment about the meaning we attribute to things. It was something along the lines of how we attribute meaning to our darkest hours, that through these times we learn so much about ourselves and the nature of the universe. But why can’t we also attribute this meaning to the good times – to the times that fill us with joy and wild abandonment? (I am paraphrasing and cannot find the original source for love nor money…)
I agree with this sentiment wholeheartedly. Regular readers of my blog will know that I have been sidelined from running due to tendonitis in my ankle. Now, this could have been one of my darkest hours. My training was coming along beautifully and I was well within my reach to run a sub 1:55 half marathon in July. But no, not to be. And I was ok with that. I am still not completely sure why I didn’t have a “moment” or five in desperation for an opportunity missed nor why after having missed the race and seen pics of the delightful gentleman who ran with my bib number (looking like he was nailing it), I don’t feel any kind of resentment or dissatisfaction. Instead, I feel happy and content – although maybe not full of wild abandonment quite yet.
No darkest hour for me.
Ah, but I still have had some great learning from this very positive experience. Firstly, that resilience REALLY IS the breakfast of champions, and secondly, how much easier life is when you can go with the flow and keep things in perspective.
Instead of lamenting my lack of running, I have (finally) started to enjoy cycling. Together with my newly rediscovered love of swimming, I am feeling fitter and stronger than I have for a long time. Probably since I was a teenager if I am completely honest.
And through all of this cross training I am also discovering that I really don’t seem to have ANY fast twitch muscles. BUT, I do have endurance and I have it in spades. When the young girls at swim squad start slowing down in the last 10 minutes, that’s when I feel at my best. I have my rhythm and am content being alone in my head. I feel that I could just keep on swimming at my own pace, in my own way, for another hour. (Anyone else hearing Dory’s voice? Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming).
So, no more fighting to get faster. From now on it is all about just enjoying the moment and this lifelong fitness journey that I am on.
Who’s up for a swim? Or a cycle? Or a run?